Most relevant section translated to english:
If he (Trump) wins the election on November 5, his billionaire supporter Musk will chair the new board. This is to implement a full financial and performance audit of the entire government and make recommendations for drastic reforms.
Source: Swiss state media article
That will happen right after Vin Diesel becomes US president after Trump chokes on a burger (not poisoned, sorry). Vin Diesel will be replaced by Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho after he flattens Diesel with a monster truck.
omg vin the guy who invented diesel
And the system to uniquely identify vehicles. Seems like a real car guy.
Cars are his family
Would be an honor to be led by a 5 times ultimate smackdown champion and porn superstar.
Had me in the first half.
I sensed a great disturbance in the force, as though millions of programmers cried out in pain and were suddenly silenced.
Can’t wait for him to start messing with timezones next.
The great savior will implement the metric system
Yeah but he’ll change every base unit to x, so now we measure acceleration in x/x^2 and volume is measured in x^3 and the highway speed limit is 80x/(x/60).
The Paypal mafia will level up. Such a gross thought
Xnited Xtates of Xmerica
“It’x really hard 2 talk lixe xix” - Strong Bad, but edgier
Ah yes, the Xeriouxly Forxe.
No, I tried only replacing the initials with an X, not all instances of the letter S like Strong Bad did.
On the plus side, all movies will be rated X
Is this satire?
That the country will be renamed? yes. That Trump has said he’ll nominate Musk? No, sadly.
No, this is Patrick.
hahaha Amsterdam will gain New York back
Shitposting?
Well, look where we are
I believe you just solved the riddle of the sphinx.
So the whole “draw Vin Diesel from memory” post was a massive psyop laying the groundwork.
